I drove an hour an 20 minutes last night to see Solar Guy. I had texted him in the morning that I was looking forward to it – got back a “yeah, me too” type thing.
Dinner is good. Convo goes well. Movie is funny as hell, we have our hand on each others arm or leg through the whole thing. And then he drives me back to my car and says he has to fire someone the next day so he needs to go prep.
I tell him I am hitting drinks with a friend (Tattoo Exec who is flirty but in the friend zone). I mean, the fuck? It is 9:10.
Later I tell him about the convo I am having with my dude friend…..
So he wants to see me again, he wants to “exhaust” me, but when
I throw out an option he is busy. I realize I did not react with enough zest for the exhaust me comment to make it all hot….but I am getting NO emotion off of this guy. The attorney tells me he is home “pining” for me. He wants to kiss me, calls me baby or sexy….I know he is feeling something. Solar guy? He might be robot.
I am not sure what to do with him.
Meanwhile, the attorney is telling me at the same time that he will drive out and see me (last night). All this because he thinks he gets to cum again, I think. I am stressed about how to not have sex with him. I am not ready. I am not ready to get attached.
I am not the sex pot he thinks I am. I am rather vanilla. I have never had a long relationship where I felt good about ALL of the sex we were having. I could feel good sometimes but not all the time. I am not an easy O and that bothers a lot of men. Or they are unwilling to hear me when I say I need the toys to get there.
Shrug….we will see….