Second dates and first impressions

Saturday was a birthday party for a friend.  As I was walking into the party I texted Solar guy:

“I should have brought you as my date”

“Yes, you should have”

So, I  invited him down. And he came. He was polite to my friends. Talked to the one guy no one can stand.  And bought me drinks.  

Everyone went home and we went to another “hidden” bar for one more.  We then talked and made out in the car behind the parking garage.  Stupid?  Yes.  We watched the time change.  

He wanted me to go home with him (he lives about 40 minutes from where we were at and I live 10) to spend the night and “Get used to each other”.  Weird way to put it.  But he knows he confuses me.  He is brilliant and possibly batshit insane.

My house was (still is) a wreck so that was not an option.  I said no.  And with surprise he says:

“Oh.  You are traditional aren’t you?  Not on the outside but underneath?”

And I nodded my head.  And went home.  I texted him (it is 5 am at this point) that just because I did not spend the night does not mean we cannot hang out Sunday.  He agrees and says we will chat tomorrow.

I wake up super late and text him to see if he wants to hang.  I have 2 options – 1) Do not shower and go work and then go home or 2) Shower, work and go see him.

What I do not gamble on is option 3 which turns out the be fucking awesome.  But we will get to that in a minute.

I shower anyway, since I have not had an answer from him thinking I will be 1/3 of the way to his house (for work).  I look pretty decent for getting not a lot of bad sleep.

And he says he wants to work on one of his projects instead and can he take a rain check.  Of course you can.  You can do anything you would like.

But so can I.

So I text my Valentines Day date the Tattoo exec and ask him to meet me for a cocktail.  We had tentative plans but nothing solid.

At about the same time, J the Lawyer, now named Tattoo Attorney, texts to meet up in the early evening.  He has a few hours before meeting people for dinner he says.

I hem and haw.  The communication has been different. We spent about 2 weeks trying to connect (little did I know this may have worked in my favor) via phone.  He called and we chatted and then he wanted me to call him back, but I was super busy that day.

I was a little put off that he sends me a link to his company just about immediately upon chatting online. I did enjoy that there was a video I could watch.  But his responses were short (to my longer ones) and I was  thinking he was not very interested.

So, when I arrived I was thinking I would just see how I felt about him and his attitude and if it was done early that would be ok.

I show up, the conversation is decent.  He tries to make us equals by saying we work the same way (no paychecks, prefer fewer bigger deals to lots of smaller deals) and he knows I understand things about his business that maybe others do not.

We move on to what he does.  And this is where I am finally interested – he is so passionate about it.  He tells me about one case and he is almost in tears. He loves what he does.  Or he loves how he can help the little guy.

While a very smart man who deals with amounts of money I cannot even fathom he is very real.  He is wearing Chucks.  He has a tattoo on his forearm – its words – and we know how I love words.  He is short.  5′ 9 my ass.  I should not have worn my highest heels but I was not really paying attention.  He is not pretentious.  He mentions fancy restaurants I have never heard of  but I cannot say I felt like he was bragging.  His world is different than mine.  His undergrad was at a commuter school.  His law degree from a UC.  Nothing to be ashamed of, but he goes up against Ivy League lawyers all the time.  I think he is actually more simple and down to earth than he is telling me.

He does drop come info on people he has banged – one saying he fucks like a mack truck.  I take it is stride, especially because I am not sure where I stand.  At all.

Well after the time he said he was supposed to be at dinner, he finally says he has to go.

[In the middle of this whole night I get a text from one of threesome that his girlfriend is cheating on him.  It was something he had suspected for the last week, so not a surprise.  But nothing I could deal with while on this date.  So, I am anxious to go now and tend to my friend.]

He walks me to my car and I drive him to his.  I think he kisses me briefly and gets out.  I go around the block and I see him at a light as I go through.

I call my friend who does not answer.  And as I am about 2 exits down the freeway the Tattoo Lawyer calls.  His car had been broken into.  Lots of stuff stolen.

“I am not going to the city now.  You want another drink?”.

Of course I do.  I pick him up at home and we head to a bar not too far away.   He maintains a good mood with little outbursts of WTF MY CAR.  But then he starts to talk about his dad.  Who seems to be a character.  And this is when I think I like him.  To hear him talk about his father who is the polar opposite charms me.

We are sitting next to each other and I am rubbing his back to comfort him after the break in.  He has his hands in my lap.  It feels nice to be close to him.

We make out a bit in the bar.  And then on the street after last call.  And then in the car.  He does not invite me in. 

He does text me a few minutes later.  And then responds when I send a thank you back.  He texts me this morning too.  And I make a comment about drinking on the patio this weekend since it will be very warm.  And he asks if he can come.  I tell him I like him so  far so of course he can.  He says he likes me back.

I am not sure he is really into me.  I am looking at his pics and thinking maybe he is more awkward and goofy than he seems (which I would like).  But I am happy to see what happens next.

 

 

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