A: I get it. You want me. You need to win. And you are willing to get dirty by telling me you want to know the genuine me.
But you are still married. And what you refuse to realize is I already know all my foibles. They will still hurt when you poke and prod.
But not more than knowing you are married. And having no intention of leaving her. And I get that you have an arrangement….but I am not interested in being a part of it.
I might not love myself. I might fight you when you call me sexy. Because at my core I know I am not, as much as people want to believe the busty redhead is…..I am just not. I am a thousand things. but sexy is not one of them.
But I KNOW in my core I do not want to be involved with a married man. It is not in me to be the other woman. I am selfish. I want what I want and that is not it.
I should not have let you drive me home. I should have gone with the other guy. But part of me wants to be wanted. By anyone. And I know I should not let you talk me into these things.
I will be stronger from now on. Because I should not be crying right now, after a night out with friends. But you have made me feel less….you have made me feel broken. And that is not fair. Because I stick to my morals is this and I have done nothing I would not happily tell your wife about.
You will never give me what I deserve. You are too pretty and you have too many options to take up your time. So, I need to go away. Far away.