Just the tip

I was trying to pee before running out to a party when he called.  I quickly pulled up my underwear, leaving my pants at my ankles and lunged for the phone.  I had a split second to change my demeanor from frantic and stressed to cool and inviting.  

“Hello”, I said slowly.  The inflection was not a question.

He sputtered for a moment, I guess I sounded sexier than I anticipated or planned and took him by surprise.

We chit chatted when he recovered and made a plan to meet at a bar serving craft style cocktails at 6:30.

I went to a party and was overheating in our Indian Summer weather.

After a half a glass of wine and chit chat with a friend’s parents I hopped off to the bar.  I was a few moments early and sat outside finishing up a phone conversation with a girlfriend.

I did not see him when I went inside, so I texted him as I grabbed a bar table.  It was 6:29.

The bar was warm so I gulped water and tried to stop sweating.  I hate these meetings.  Every insecurity comes out.

I text a friend.  I peruse the menu…..time passes.  I am literally about to walk out the door at 6:46 when he walks in.  He apologizes briefly and we begin the “date”.

Martinis and fancy cucumber drinks.  The conversation is good.  He is trying to impress me with some things.  He seems like a good guy.  He wants to hangout Saturday.  He wants to show me the project he is working on.

The bill arrives as I head to the restroom.  When I come back, it is unpaid.  He goes to the restroom.  And of course I leave it unpaid.   He grabs it and says “How about I cover the drinks and you can grab the tip”.


I have dated a lot and I have never had anyone ask me that.  I have OFFERED but never on the first date.  You have said you want to see me again and you want me to throw in $10 to cover the tip. I almost offered to pay the whole fucking thing because I was so annoyed, but I let it slide.  

We walk out, heading the same direction towards our cars.  I go to hug him goodbye as he is obviously not interested in walking me to my car.  He goes in for the most awkward kiss ever.  I am way too sober and tell hi it is awkward, so he tries again.  I sort of half ass it as I have not processed the whole tip thing.

He says he will see me Saturday and leaves.  Leaves me in a dark parking lot to cross a bridge to my car.  Granted a safe enough area, and I am walking behind the mall to a parking garage, but it throws me.  Even my guy friends walk me to my car after we have breakfast or lunch.  So, WTF?

Those same guy friends talk me into giving him one more chance so I text him Saturday, fully prepared to give him one full hour of my time if he wants it.  

No response.

Ok, then.  Moving on.


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